Everyday Cheapskate: Being rich does not equal financial ease; this is what it’s really about (2024)

My life radically changed years ago when I came out of the closet, so to speak. I broke my self-imposed gag order and told the whole world about my struggle with a debilitating spending problem. I had no idea at the time this would be one of the smartest things I could ever do. By telling my story and owning up to my problem, I became accountable.

Since then I’ve read and written hundreds of thousands of words on the subject of money management. I’ve experimented with various methods. I’ve addressed audiences large and small. I’ve listened, pondered and asked questions. I’ve collected enough data to choke even a well-adjusted accountant.

Have I come to any conclusions? Thousands, to be exact, but my most important conclusion is: Anyone can learn to control their spending.

If you are experiencing financial trouble, it can undoubtedly be traced back to the time that you failed to control your spending. And the trouble just started to grow. For some of us, it grew and grew. And others of us? It grew and grew and grew and grew. And grew some more.

For more than three decades, I’ve lived, breathed, eaten, smelled and tasted money management and financial fixing. I’ve concluded that regardless of our attitudes about money, the amount we have or any other individual factors, these are the main reasons so many people are experiencing money trouble:

1. Money problems are rooted in one’s refusal to accept the fact that life is not fair. As long as you feel entitled to all kinds of material things you cannot afford, you will have money problems.

2. Money problems are the result of irregular, intermittent and unpredictable expenses. Most people don’t think about what might happen or the things that don’t happen on a regular basis when they add up their monthly expenses. So when the irregular expense creeps up, they see it as an emergency or financial crisis.

3. Money problems will never go away as long as unsecured debt is carried over from month to month. Credit card debt and its merciless interest has an odd way of reproducing itself. It never stays the same, and if it doesn’t shrink, it grows.

It still sounds crazy to me, but I know it is true: The more accountable I am, the greater my freedom. The more I am willing to be disciplined, the more numerous my options. The more carefully I plan, the bigger I dream, the better my life becomes, the more joy I experience.

I also know that whether your financial situation requires a minor correction or a major overhaul, no situation is hopeless. You can take back control of your finances. You can get out of debt and learn how to live below your means. You can pick up another job. You can get off the financial roller coaster and stay on level ground where money ceases to be an issue.

Financial ease has nothing to do with being rich. It comes as the result of taking responsibility and following sound financial principles.

It doesn’t matter if you feel beyond hope; you can change. You can stop adding to your credit card debt. You can put yourself on a spending diet. You can start tracking where your money goes. And you can do that starting today.

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Mary invites you to visit her at EverydayCheapskate.com, where this column is archived complete with links and resources for all recommended products and services. Mary invites questions and comments at “Ask Mary.” This column will answer questions of general interest, but letters cannot be answered individually. Mary Hunt is the founder of EverydayCheapskate.com, a frugal living blog, and the author of the book “Debt-Proof Living.”

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